Rant: Why 3D movies are a total con

The nvidia/sony tech needs a tv that flickers at 120Hz - ie twice 60Hz, the regular rate an HDTV refreshes at. The powered glasses are slightly bulkier and switch between left and right eyes so you get 60Hz in each with seperate images delivered. Meant to deliver true stereoscopic vision - just like your eyes perceive depth because they're fixed a few inches apart.

Cheapest I've seen it for pc is about £400 for new monitor, graphics card, goggles and maybe you need a new motherboard with that... Apparently the ps3 can do it, so you just need the new tv and goggles...

Powered glasses? Didn't even know they existed.

I've only seen one film in 3D/IMAX and that was Avatar, because, y'know, I felt I had to (plus, wasn't it this site that said it was worth an extra star if you did?)

Yeah, it was nice, but boy was it gimmicky. Sitting on the far right hand side probably didn't help, apparently it was much better if you sat directly in the middle, and even with a schnoz like mine the glasses needed constant re-adjusting, lest they fell off my face.

I'm seeing Clash the week after next with the lads and we're not bothering with 3D, I've been seeing regular films the regular way since 1989 (Honey I Shrunk the Kids was my first cinema experience... I think, maybe I should check with my folks) and I've got along fine these past few years without seeing them in 3D and paying extra for the privilege.

And lord help us if Michael Bay ever decides to jump on the bandwagon...

With HD cable TV there are bandwidth considerations, and equipment to upgrade, so you can understand why it costs. Far too expensive as it is anyway imho.

It's an excuse to charge more for tickets. Avatar made so much £ because the 3D ticket prices are huge.
Same with these HD tv channels, it doesn't cost them any
more to send an HD signal but they can charge more because
it's new.

all so true ali, why do we pay more for 3D is ther an actual reason?????

3D looks nice but to be honest i cant get used to wearing those bloody glasses, i find it uncomfortable and i cant concentrate on the film as easily,

The first time i watched Aliens was on a fuzzy as VHS but i loved it then and still love it now even if it is perfect DVDness,

saying that i remember watching Man UTD playing in a world cllub cup in Brazil, maybe around 1999, my TV played it in black and white, but my memory of it is allll in colour!!!

Fuck 3D, let it burn with pandora, paying monthly for the cinema and then having to pay extra to watch Jonny Depp mince around in a hat!! thanx cineworld....

The Tron Legacy trailer in 3D was smashing, ditto for Toy Story 3.

I find it hard to mouthbreathe with all that studio cock and stale, jizzy popcorn in my mouth, but I do my level best.

"(...) contribute absolutely nothing towards the art of cinema or culture. "

Well, they provide entertainment. Sometimes. At some points. And since it was tagged RANT I'll let myself add: fucking expensive enter-fuck-tain-fuck-ment.

I read Cameron having a fit about retrofitting movies to 3D and the sudden glut.
Whatever Beardy, you started the ball rolling now you have to sit there and watch everybody rip you off.
What's amusing is that Finallest Destination Ever 3D holds just as much interest as Avatar, and that didn't cost hundreds of millions of dollars.

I watched Girl With The Dragon Tattoo tonight - a quiet, grown up film with no 3D, no blue-meanies, no climactic battle, no Krakens, no muscular hero, no cut-scene CGI effects.
And it was really, really enjoyable.
It'll never make a bazillion dollars, but it left me thinking about what I'd watched outside of "I liked the bit where Handsome Protaganist rescued Cliche'd Damsel from the added-later monster".

So, in summary, you fucking morons* that actually pay to watch these films, give them the oxygen of your hard-earned, can sit there in silence having studios stroke it into your mouths in 3D whilst clicking together next summers identikit blockbuster ready for your slackjawed consumption.
You people* are the reason my world consists of Aston Kutchers and Twilights and Jemmifer Anistons and Celebrities on Ice.
Complaining because you're watching a film about fighting robots and winged horses and "it's in 3D" is a moot fucking argument. You wanted to watch that dross, shut the fuck up and watch mediocrity being flung at you in 3D like a gorilla hurling shit at you in a zoo.
I was warned buying Let The Right One In on DVD in Blockbusters that "it has subtitles in it" because apparently people were returning it complaining.
Fuck the vast majority of you*, that film is being remade by a director who's previous film was about a giant alien smashing New York up because you're too afraid of reading to watch it.

Don't complain that films are in 3D, complain that these films are pointless exercises in sound & fury and contribute absolutely nothing towards the art of cinema or culture.
Fuck off.

* you people doesn't refer to anybody specifically, it's a catch-all for the sorts of mouthbreathers that have made cinema what it is today.

The thing that gets me the most is charging when I have my own glasses.
No, I didn't put them in the recycle box, cinema usherchild. Why not? Because I knew I'd need them again, and therefore recycled them myself.
So why is it more expensive, if I'm not taking extra glasses?

You. Don't. Know. Excellent, thank you.

Great, then I'll have one ticket to Valentine's Day in regular D for $7 less, and then I will walk straight into your stupid 3d film.
Stealing? Perhaps. Morally reprehensible. Not in the slightest.
I hate the cinema.

However,

Last night, I paid $7 to watch The Breakfast Club on the big screen. It was a theatre full of people who really wanted to watch the film - chewing was at a minimum, no-one got up to the loo, and there was not one text message alert noise throughout the whole movie.
It was brilliant. I love that kind of cinema.

The confusing thing for me is the different types of "3D" you can get. Firstly, there seems to be two types in the cinema - one with expensive glasses that need to be powered, the other with flimsy cardboard glasses (that somehow justifies a massive price hike - what next, Cash4Cardboard?). Then you get the home consumer options, which seem to be either forking out loads for a new 120Hz set and all the other equipment, or that weird "layers of green" 3D which is a bit like the anaglyph red/blue...but different, yet doesn't require nowt but special glasses and is compatible with everything.

Secondly: gaming. Being a huuuge PC/Xbox gamer (surprised, ladies?), I've had a look at what's out there, and the cost of upgrading a PC to use the latest Nvidia stuff is obscene, but new stuff always is. That ace Batman game has just been re-released with the green 3D glasses. Again, not sure how it works but there seems to be no additional cost. Bet it gives you a green tint to everything for hours after.

EDIT: no, I didn't just spell "anaglyph" wrong in an embarrassingly Freudian way...

Edited at 20:00 on 27/03/10

Well... yes. I don't give a fuck about 3D and I'm confused as to why the studios think they can revive a horse so dead it might as well be dog food. This is a gimmick that will die a quick death once the novelty has worn off and I maintain that feeling self-concious in your own home when wearing those twatty glasses will get old real quick.