Review: Wanted

Saw this at the cinema when it came out

I thought it was awesome, I loved every minute, and I'm basically in love with Angelina so seeing her arse is always a bonus.

I imagine they're basing their reviews on the whole film though, and not just the intro

I couldn't tell you though I've not read it I just looked at how many stars it had

Turned it off after the intro. Just couldn't be bothered with it, which is a terrible reason for not watching something (considering I probably sat around scratching at myself instead) - maybe I'll try again in the right mood. Surprised at the amount of positive reviews actually.

I liked this quite a bit. Morgan Freeman does his wizened mentor bit, Jolie looks like guns make her orgasm and the bloke from Last King of Scotland does a good low-rent Ewan McGregor.
I liked the train bit best, the dangling train.

Police arrested a thalidomide Muslim in London earlier today. They've charged him with bringing small arms into the country.

That reminds me. There's apparently a Verne Troyer sex tape out there. Get hunting, midget porn aficionados.

Q. What's the smallest pub in the world?

A. The Thalidomide Arms

Sorry to hear you've been lasering your eyeballs with direct to DVD action gems. I'm sure Wesley (Snipes that is) appreciates it. I've actually been looking forward to Wanted, even with it's obvious alterations from the Millar/J.G. Jones comic, so with your assurances of limited, artistic flourishes of slo-mo I'll still give it a whirl. If it's rubbish though my comments may be over-cranked..

I've just noticed that Angelina Jolie in that bottom pic totally looks like a Thalidomide. Brrr.

It's not so bad here. There's not much prancing about. The slo-mo is used more for gunny stuff really. I've been watching a lot of direct-to-DVD action films for work lately and some of those are ridiculous - the Garth Marenghi technique of padding out the run-time by making everything slow-motion.

I've lost patience for orgiastic slo-mo in action films; yes it looks very pretty but while you're doing your ballet Mr Bourne has dislocated all your limbs. I'm not suggesting all movies adhere to the epileptic seizures of Paul Greengrass's movie-making but I sense in Wanted's case I'm already winding my hand for the next scene.

Heh, there's a few of them in here actually. The last shot in particular is a bit good.

Sounds like the most audacious shot ever put to film to me.

It'd be an honor to stir Brad Pitt's porridge. I'd take great pleasure in it, in fact.

Um, and the movie is great. Porridge and 'cinematic spunk' aside. The train scene is awesome, not just because it's large scale carnage, but because of the way it's shot. It verges on beautiful at times, the pan down underneath is just... breathtaking.

I bet it's covered in loads of shit tattoos, like the rest of her.
However sexy she may be, I just can't escape the fact that Billy-Bob Thornton has been up there.
I mean come on, Slingblade slung his beans in.
You can't be sexy after that.


But yeah, film looks top.

Thing is, this is the only kinda stuff Jolie is really good for. I can't be bothered to watch her worthier-than-thou Oscar grabs, her first attempts at action sucked (Tomb Raider) and she otherwise appears in very poor films. This suits her perfectly: eye candy and not much else. It's her job to be sexy and she's finally doing it. And she gets her bum out.

I don't get the fascination with her myself. Her lips are fucking huge and she's incredibly bony. Look at her arm on the poster for chrissakes.
Morgan Freeman swearing and holding a shoota - now that's me sold. And if Bekmambetov does half the mental things he does in the Night/Daywatch movies it'll be fun to watch if nothing else.

Sorry - but McAvoy will always be the White Queens beeyatch, Mr Tumnus.
Don't even get me started on his McAmerican accent.

Gina Jolie more than makes up for that though.

I'll swallow my dislike of Angelina Jolie for this one.
Absolutely loved Nightwatch & Daywatch, so letting Bekmambetov have a wider canvas makes me hard.
The trailer looks like 2hrs of the bit from Daywatch when she drives the car up the building and into the lobby.

It lives up to the trailers, and I was worried it wouldn't. There's so much going on, and all the action scenes have a great sense of humour too. The actors never do the 'I'm so fucking cool' face when they're doing these outrageous stunts.

Honestly, best action film since The Matrix I reckon. Well worth a punt, comes out on Wednesday, go see it.

Looks awesome. I've been itching to see this since I saw the Russian trailer.

What are you, gay? It's been on my list since I saw the first trailer.

I just don't know if I can bring myself to watch it. It's xXx without the gay breakdancing dude. Is that a good thing? I just don't know.