Becky Suter

News, Reviews & Features
  • Review: John Wick: Chapter 3 is a war on the senses - and on the balls

    Movie Review | Becky Suter | 17th May 2019

    We all know there are six basic story types: the fall, the fall then rise, the rise then fall, the rise from nothing, mismatched buddy cops, and stop that wedding. The third installment of the John Wick franchise delivers a seventh - the fall then rise then kick you in the bollocks, go to Casablanca, rise, then literal fall. The film's subtitle, Parabellum, translates to "prepare for war" - in this case a war on limbs, vital bodily organs, and your ability to stomach extreme violence, so you can't say it didn't warn you.

  • Review: Pet Sematary is flatter than a run over cat

    Movie Review | Becky Suter | 5th April 2019

    The long list of Stephen King adaptations run from the great (The Shining, Misery), the so-so (original Carrie), to the just downright silly one where everyone gets alien bum worms called "Shitweasels" (Dreamcatcher). Following on from the passable remake of It, where Pennywise became a sewer daddy for thirsty millennials wanting to bang clowns, the latest of King’s books to be resurrected is a confused and uninspiring mess that proves, as one character helpfully puts it, sometimes dead is better.

  • Review: Cold Pursuit sees Mr Plow out for revenge in a temperate thriller

    Movie Review | Becky Suter | 7th February 2019

    Over the past decade, Liam Neeson has had an interesting evolution from Serious Actor to Tough Action Dad, exclusively playing single-minded individuals dispensing their own brand of vigilante justice. Since Taken, he’s developed his particular set of skills to work within the same template over and over again, becoming a one man wrecking crew in the likes of Run All Night, Non-Stop and then Non-Stop-But-On-A-Train, The Commuter. He’s even punched a wolf in the face. All batshit crazy, yet enjoyable nonetheless. But in a recent controversial interview, Neeson revealed he was once almost in his own version of American History X, contemplating taking a cosh to any “black bastard” who crossed his path to quench his own insatiable thirst for revenge. His telling of this story was probably intended to highlight how revenge never helps anyone, but instead highlighted that this is a reality for black men and people of colour, and attempts to rationalise these thoughts could be seen, at best, as attempts to normalise racism. And to think, my main concern before seeing the film was how many snow puns and Simpsons’ gags I could shoehorn into this review.

  • Review: Vice shows Dick Cheney as a man with few virtues and ohhh, I see what you did there

    Movie Review | Becky Suter | 21st January 2019

    My knowledge of Dick Cheney pretty much started and ended with knowing him as the veep who shot a guy in the face whilst on a hunting trip. Had I bothered to actually watch all of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart episodes I've recorded over the years, I would have known that Cheney has always been the dark heart of American politics; a man rotten to his very core, which itself is a tiny black hole from which no joy or light can escape, who's been haunting the White House long before President Trump gleefully served McNugget BBQ sauce out of the Lincoln silver gravy boats to those footballers. Luckily, Adam McKay is here again to distil complex information to dummies like me, although newsflash - the political system is like, totally corrupt, you guys.

  • The Apprentice: season 14, episode 11 recap: "Pretty Big Deal in Peterborough"

    TV Feature | Becky Suter | 13th December 2018

    Well, that was a big fuss over nothing. I give a vote of no confidence in delaying The Apprentice by ten minutes and totally messing up my dinner plans. I was hoping to see Theresa May saying "Thank you for the opportunity" before walking out of No.10 with her wheelie suitcase.

  • The Apprentice: season 14, episode 10 recap: "Work, Rest and Play"

    TV Feature | Becky Suter | 8th December 2018

    I feel about Christmas the same way John Oliver feels about New Year: both are like the death of a pet - you know it's coming, but nothing can quite prepare you for how awful it is. The same can be said for the latter stages of The Apprentice.

  • The Apprentice: season 14, episode 7 recap: "It's a Mad, Mad, Mad Gardener's World"

    TV Feature | Becky Suter | 15th November 2018

    In many ways, good leadership is a lot like gardening. You need to plant seeds of ideas, nurture growth, and sometimes get your hands dirty. You need to trust the process, and have patience whilst rooting out weeds in order to flourish. Or if you’re Lord Sugar, just pour salt on the earth so that nothing beautiful can ever grow again.

  • The Apprentice: season 14, episode 5 recap: "A Load of Old Cobblers"

    TV Feature | Becky Suter | 2nd November 2018

    Sneakerfactory.net (the one-stop shop for all your shoe consultation needs) provides the basic steps into how to become a shoe designer; learn how to draw, go to a design school, get a shoe mentor, build a portfolio and read plenty of books. Or, just do it because a grumpy old millionaire has told you to do it in 24 hours, and oh, can you make the canapés for the launch event as well? What even is this any more?

  • Review: Bohemian Rhapsody isn't the real life, it's just fantasy

    Movie Review | Becky Suter | 25th October 2018

    Watching Bohemian Rhapsody is a bit like seeing Queen perform with Adam Lambert: yeah, the songs are all good, but at the back of your mind you know you're not getting the real deal. Bryan Singer/Dexter Fletcher's biopic is the sanitised retelling of Queen that leaves out all the good stuff in order to be family friendly. Where are the dwarves with trays of cocaine on their heads? The nights out with Kenny Everett and Princess Di in drag? Naked renditions of We Are The Champions? Can anybody find me something to love?

  • The Apprentice: season 14, episode 3 recap: "Your Donuts Make Me Go Nuts"

    TV Feature | Becky Suter | 20th October 2018

    This week, a tricky technical leaves one contestant in tears when our amateur bakers are asked to create 2000 show-stopping doughnuts, despite the fact that their backgrounds range from digital marketing to tree surgery and absolutely nothing to do with running a pop-up bakery. As the heat rises, who will be Star Baker, who will leave the tent, and who’s got a soggy bottom? It’s The Great British Bake O-h hang on.