Attention journalists: free 2011 movie poster quotes!

A new year brings news blockbusters, and with new blockbusters comes the annual journalistic jockeying for poster space. Get the jump on the competition with these handy, cut-out-and-keep poster quotes for 2011's biggest movies. You're welcome, Alan Frank!

Green Lantern



This year's biggest superhero movie offers some prime poster real estate. Remember: it's a universe-spanning adventure, so keep it simple, something along the lines of...

Failing that, try a play on the word lantern. Audiences love that stuff.

If all else fails, colour pun. COLOUR PUN.

Or something.
Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides



This one's easy: just re-use the lines you used when Pirates 2 and 3 came out. For example, perhaps Sir would like...

If you're looking for something a little more sophisticated, perhaps play up the pirate angle a little more. It's a bit US-centric, but how about...

Too highbrow? Simplify.

Remember all these when Pirates 5 is released.
Thor



Tricky one, this. Marvel's Thor is an untested property, set in the twin worlds of Viking heaven Asgard and Earth's mortal realm. After a lot of thought, we'd go for...

You know, because Thor carries a hammer. Alright, if you're going to be sniffy about it, try this on for size....

Too clever, we know. Fuck it: just use this one before Nuts magazine gets there first.

Oh, and give it 10/10. Obviously.
Captain America: The First Avenger



It's another superhero movie, so you'll have to be careful you don't use up all your A-grade stuff on Thor. Luckily, Captain America has the word 'America' in it. So...

Or...

If you're feeling particularly saucy, you might want to reference the (sure-to-be) outstanding performance of Oscar-nominee in-waiting, Chris Evans.

Don't be tempted: there's plenty of room to refer to Chris Evans as 'no, not that Chris Evans' in your full review.
Sucker Punch



Who cares about the content: them's fighting words!

And so on. It's actually about six infeasibly sexy nutters in short skirts who journey to magical worlds of ninjas, dragons and giant robots in their minds. So, you know...

Don't over think it. What would TalkSport Magazine say? They'd say, 'Yes of course we'll give you five stars! Have a glowing review quote!'

Also: 'Sucker' rhymes with 'Fucker'. Just saying.
Red Riding Hood



No need to thank me.
Transformers: Dark Of The Moon



Simple robot puns won't do any more - you need to dream a little bigger. This one's set on and around the Moon, so may I suggest...

I know, right? Inspired! I just looked up in the night sky and there it was! Try also...

No need to see the film first: we can guarantee the following quote will be 100% accurate.

I'll start writing the four-star review now, shall I?
Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows: Part II



An epic cinematic event deserves an epic poster quote. This one took me all night, so someone had better take it. Use it wisely.

That took a lot out of me. The following sounded good at 3 in the morning.

I'm spent. I found this one behind the sofa.

That'll do. It's Harry bloody Potter.
The Smurfs



COLOUR PUN.

COLOUR PUN.

COLOUR PUN.

You've earned that £50,000 a year.
Fast Five



Cars! Sweet, beautiful automobiles! Here's some four-wheeled wordplay for the lazy journalists willing to sniff Paul Walker's exhaust pipe.

Did you know Vin Diesel is in this? Because he is.

Warning: the following review quote will make you sound like a dick.

Good work, everyone. Take five! You've made a difference today! I hope to see these babies on bus stops within months!