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Box-office report: Avengers: Age Of Ultron makes total fucking shit-tonne

Ali Gray

26th April 2015

The first Avengers movie broke records when it scored a fucking massive domestic opening weekend of $204.7 million fucking dollars, but sequel Age Of Ultron looks like it might make even more fucking money than that, with a fucking astonishing take of $201.2 million fucking dollars internationally - and that's before the fucking thing has even fucking opened in America.

Fuck a duck: Joss Whedon's Avengers sequel is lighting shit up overseas, where it's already wiped its arse on over $200 million dollars internationally. Age Of Ultron has opened in 44 titty-fucking terrorities - including Austria, Switzerland and fucking Belgium of all fucking places - and it's almost made its budget back already: that's how much fucking dough this cunt is coining.

That's a lot of fucking fedoras, pal.


When Avengers: Age Of Ultron opens domestically this week, it's expected to make frankly fucking obscene amounts of money - the kind of windfall that Scrooge McFucking Duck would swim in, the prick - possibly in the region of $200-250 million shitting dollars. Factor in the fucking Chinese opening on May 12th and you're looking at a motherfucking movie that'll probably hit one billion bastard dollars even more quickly than Fast & Fucking Furious 7. Jesus fucking Christ, that is an absolute shit-tonne of money. Shit.

Fuck.

As if it wasn't already enough of a big swinging dick, Age Of Ultron shattered IMAX records with a fucking gobsmacking take of $10.4 million, the biggest international IMAX opening weekend of all fucking time mate. Rip off my head and shit down my neck, that is just un-fucking-believable. It's like a fucking runaway train of money that's fucking up other movies around the fucking world, like, OUT OF MY WAY PAUL BLART, I'M AN AVENGERS MOVIE, BEEP BEEP MOTHERFUCKER.

Meanwhile in the US, Blake Lively romantic drama The Age Of Adaline was the biggest opener in third place with $13.8 million.

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