Bond 23 officially put on hold

Financial problems have officially shackled 007: the in-development Bond movie has hit the skids, and a release date is uncertain, as is the cast and crew. Sounds like someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Quite how MGM, who own the James Bond franchise, have found themselves in such dire financial straits I won't speculate. I will say that, given Bond is a billion-dollar franchise, their money men must be total retards. They must have been shagging the cash cow instead of milking it.

Such economic cack-handery has officially put the kibosh on Bond 23, which was due to go into production with Sam Mendes as director, with a prospective release date of Winter 2011. Not any more. Bond now has a licence to sit around the house, masturbating intermittently.

EON Productions has issued a statement through producers Edward and Barbara Broccoli, stating in no uncertain terms that Bond's future isn't looking bright.

So what does this mean? James Bond will return, only nobody knows when, and in what capacity. While Peter Morgan's screenplay can safely gather dust, Sam Mendes' involvement is less secure, and it's unlikely that the director will hold open a window of opportunity long enough for MGM's accounts department to cash in their pennies. However, you'd presume Daniel Craig's contract was watertight enough to keep him on a retainer.

Of course, this is all speculation; MGM could be sold tomorrow and production would begin again. But in this topsy-turvy industry, the Bond landscape could change completely in next to no time - just look at the Spider-Man 4 saga.

Wait... that's it! A Bond reboot! Grittier and darker! It's the only way to save Bond! Base it on one of the early Ian Fleming books or something. Go back to basics. That'll probably work. Probably.