Dean Gaffney now only celebrity not to have completed Ice Bucket Challenge

Iain Robertson

21st August 2014

The days of celebrities pouring water over their heads for charity appear to be numbered, after it was revealed today that former Eastenders star Dean Gaffney is the last remaining celebrity on the planet not to have taken part.

"It's not for lack of trying," claimed an exasperated Gaffney. "I've been trying to do it for weeks, only no one will nominate me."

The challenge, which has seen celebrities pouring water on their heads, and then boasting about which other A-listers they're friends with - and can get to make tits of themselves - has taken the internet by storm. At one point last week, Instagram consisted entirely of videos of wet celebrities.

"This challenge is a brilliant idea," claimed billionaire businessman Richard Branson, whose soaking and subsequent £5 donation has raked up over a million hits on YouTube. "For years, celebrities have been made to feel that they need to play down their charity work. Now, in exchange for a minimal donation and getting a bit wet, they can brag about it all they want, and look like fucking heroes at the same time."

But not Gaffney. The actor has recently been seen standing outside the Eastenders Elstree studio carrying a bucket of water, and begging passing cast members to nominate him for the challenge. He has more than once been escorted off the premises by security and was on one occasion heard to shout: "Just give me two minutes with Adam Woodyatt. We're best buds, I know he'll do it!"

"I'm getting desperate," Gaffney went on. "Even Shaun Williamson and Wellard won't return my calls. All I want is one celebrity friend to ask me to do it. Even fucking Keith Harris managed to get himself nominated."

In related news, Noel Edmonds has announced plans to sue charities that have benefited from the challenge. The Deal Or No Deal host has announced that he created the idea of publicity-hungry celebrities getting soaked and owns the rights to the format.

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