Excuse me, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit

I just got emailed a press release that shocked me to my very core: "Lionsgate UK teams with Keith Lemon for its first British comedy feature, KEITH LEMON: THE FILM." What kind of God would allow this?

I can count the number of British TV comedy characters that have successfully made the leap to movies on one hand, and four of them are The Inbetweeners. Unfortunately, the success of that movie has effectively given the green light for every two-bit television comedian to pitch his way to a feature-length outing, starting with "hilarious" comic creation, Keith Lemon. Haha, I get it! He's like Steve Coogan's Tony Ferrino, only now and not ten years ago!

Lemon, who you may have seen hosting ITV2's flagship comedy quiz show Celebrity Juice, is the creation of Leigh Francis; a man with a multitude of classic comedy characters to his name.



A Keith Lemon feature film? God help us. He's barely even a one-joke character, the gag being that, well, he's a total knob. How are they going to stretch that out to an hour and a half?

And then, just in case you weren't completely sold on its worth...

Production starts on November 17th in Belfast, with Francis on writing duty and Paul Angunawela directing. His past credits include TV series Experimental (file not found in memory banks) and Keith Lemon's Fit, a workout DVD starring Keith Lemon and some nice-looking girls with big breasts. If you're in any doubt of his credentials, here's a clip.



I never thought I'd say this, but 'Eye Of The Tiger' is too good for these guys.