Important stripper/werewolf news

In a move that's sure to alienate at least 50% of our readers, here's an article about direct-to-DVD British comedy-horror Strippers vs Werewolves; a film destined to be as bad as it sounds.
Once upon a time, one thing in a movie was enough to keep audiences happy. Then people got greedy and demanded more things, which bred mega-things, followed by things vs things - naturally leading to mega- things vs mega-things. The only logical progression from there is where we are today: naked-things vs hairy-things. It's fair to say at this point we are not living in a renaissance.

Taking full advantage of this cultural low (see also: Cockneys vs Zombies), Strippers vs Werewolves trades on the promise that, yes, this film will definitely feature blood, gore and some tit for Daddy. I'm sorry, that may be the worst sentence I've ever typed. But don't let my cynical self put you off, judge for yourself from the trailer and images below that have been doing the rounds recently:










Hmmm. As terrible as Strippers vs Werewolves looks and sounds, there's no denying that's a pretty kickass cast for something going straight to the shelf. Alongside a slew of UK soap regulars they've somehow managed to rope in Robert Englund, Steven Berkoff and Sarah Douglas, amongst a whole host of other recognisable names. A quick check on IMDB shows there's even someone who was in Krull!

So the casting department clearly know what they're doing, which should inspire a bit of confidence at least. But don't get too excited about the 'Bill Murray' mentioned in the poster - that's actually Billy Murray, aka Don Beech from The Bill. However, do get excited about Ali Bastian, who used to play Becca in Hollyoaks and still ranks #2 in the official Hollyoaks Babe List in my head (right behind Izzy).

Maybe Strippers vs Werewolves does stand a chance after all. Or maybe it'll be a big pile of shit. Who knows. All I know is I'm now sick of typing the words "strippers" and "werewolves", so I'm going to bleach my hands before bed. Good night.