Moses: The Movie, 300-style

Fox are retelling Bible stories on the big screen, starting with the story of Moses, reimagined in the style of Zack Snyder's 300. You'll have to watch it... Fox commands you. (*YYYEEAAAAAAHHHH!")

Adam Cooper and Bill Collage, the writing team who just got finished turning Herman Melville's Moby Dick into a graphic novel treatment for the director of Wanted (inappropriate alert!), have sold a new pitch to Fox, based on an even more auspicuous literary source: The Bible.

They plan to retell the story of Moses - the plagues, the commandments, the parting of the Red Sea, the rebirth as the son of Chris Martin - but in a nod to modern attention-deficit audiences, plan for it to be shot in the style of 300. That is to say, all style and no substance. And with giant mutant locusts and casual racism.

This could go both ways; on one hand, anything even slightly Churchy absolutely crucifies at the box office (thank you) because God demands that religious types see it in order for them to judge it.

On the other hand, it could be a load of boring old shit with Gerard Butler in a grey wig and beard talking to a CGI burning bush voiced by Christian Bale. More soon if I can be bothered.