Movie news round-up: Bond, Batman, Branagh and black guys
Posted by Ali at 12:00 on 22 Jul 2012
First things first, incredibly exciting news regarding Jurassic Park 4: producer Frank Marshall has estimated that it'll be in cinemas "within two years". Oh god it's really happening oh god so exciting can't wait I'm hyperventilating I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR.
Official details won't be revealed until Monday, but sources say The Dark Knight Rises has enjoyed a stellar start at the box-office, netting as much as $163m in its opening weekend - a record for a 2D film. Wow, those guys at Warner Bros should really be thinking about making MORE superhero movies - that's a no-brainer! Bring on The Dark Knight Rises 2!
The character of Mother Russia looks set to play a part in Kick-Ass 2, if this new casting call is anything to go by:
Somewhere, Michael Clarke Duncan is popping oestregen pills like tic-tacs.
"Classic Villain. An ex-KBG officer who is now being paid by the week by Chris to fight in his group — she is easily the most skilled and just a ruthless killer in general. Described as a ‘roided-out female bodybuilder, she needs to be extremely physically imposing and muscular, though still come across as feminine. As tall as possible (6ft and over only). Indicate height on submission."
As well as directing Paramount's new Jack Ryan movie, Kenneth Branagh has cast himself as the movie's villain. "Kenneth Branagh is an supremely talented actor and has just the right qualities we're looking to bring to this project. I'm extremely excited to work with him," said Kenneth Branagh.
Somehow, the forthcoming Robocop remake has amassed one of the most promising looking casts in ages. Joining Joel Kinnaman, Samuel L Jackson, Gary Oldman, Abbie Cornish and Hugh Laurie is everyone's favourite inkblot anti-hero Jackie Earle Haley in an as-yet unspecified role. Jay Baruchel is also looking likely to be cast, probably as 'Whiny Nasal Guy From The Future'.
Sony have had a banner year so far in 2012, with The Amazing Spider-Man, 21 Jump Street and Men In Black 3 all making mad dollar. Naturally, this means they're looking ahead to sequels of all of these movies: Men In Black 4 is now in active development (that noise you just heard was Tommy Lee Jones' weary bones sighing) while 21 Jump Street 2 is now on the fasttrack, but Marc Webb may not return for Spidey 2. Also, they're rebooting Jumanji, because PROMOTIONAL BOARD GAMES.
Collider have a gaggle of new clips and pics from The Bourne Legacy, including this one of Ed Norton and Stacy Keach watching 2 Girls, 1 Cup.
I have a theory that most films are greenlit by producers who are absent-mindedly browsing the internet when they should be investing in new, original properties. Hence a big-screen adaptation of Wes Ball's online animated short, Ruin, which you can watch below, will now be brought to fruition by McG. I was going to make a joke about ERMAHGERD: The Movie but you know it's already in production.
Here are some things that are happening with The Hangover: Part III. It'll reportedly be set in Tijuana (do a shot for every donkey sex joke). Mike Epps will reprise his role as 'Black Doug' (do a shot for every race joke). Ken Jeong will return in an expanded role (do a shot in your head with a gun and sleep an eternal sleep).
ELF UPDATE! Thor: The Dark World will allegedly feature elves. More on this exciting elf story as it develops.
This supercut of '135 Shots To Restore Your Faith In Cinema' is pretty cool if you have eight minutes to spare and like sunsets and clouds and shit. Me, I'm going to be watching tortoise faceplant for the next eight minutes.
Sam Raimi is no longer directing the World Of Warcraft movie, probably because he stole the Blizzard CEO's enchanted coracle in a daring early morning raid with his clan.
Finally this week, we've been treated to a new Skyfall videoblog (78 seconds of PURE James Bond DRIVING ACTION!) plus a bunch of new stills. Curiously, Sam Mendes says of the film: "There's something about the last part of the movie which deliberately, very consciously, could have taken place in 1962." You heard it here first: Javier Bardem IS Dr. No.