Rage

Oscar nominations: your guide at what to be outraged by

Ah, the Oscars: the perfect time for film bloggers to get up in arms about [insert pointless topic here]. Here's your 5-step guide to getting your knickers in a twist about this year's nominations.

You wouldn't download an assclown: A rant on why cinemas are dying

Pity Hollywood. For they are losing money hand over fist because of dirty internet pirates. Pity John Travolta and his private jet fleet; pity George Clooney unable to heat his Italian lakeside mansion; Pity Tom Cruise for... well, being Tom Cruise. But pity these poor studios and stars, living on the breadline and having to sacrifice so much in their struggle to survive.

Or, to look at it a different way: fuck these cosseted prima-donnas and their multi-million dollar lifestyles.