Trailer

Movie trailer round-up: weddings, masters and paddling pooches

Luke

24th July 2012

Matt is preparing to get married and go on his honeymoon, so I have stepped up to try and fill his big shoes by covering the trailers for the next few weeks. Hey wait a minute, what the fuck? These shoes are full of scrunched up strips of newspaper!

Amazingly, someone took time out of their clearly hefty schedule to click the dislike button on a trailer for a documentary about legendary poster artist Drew Struzan, Drew: The Man Behind The Poster. I don't understand this planet.


You really can't fault a film where a wedding is interrupted because the guests have been infected with some sort of zombie virus, and the bride takes it upon herself to dispose of them with a chainsaw. Which means scientifically [REC]³ Génesis is going to be the best film ever.


Billy Bob Thornton's Jayne Mansfield's Car has a great ensemble cast, but is also a horrible reminder that time will eventually make fools of us all. Except for Kevin Bacon, who hasn't aged since 1987. Note to self: take up dancing.


If Attack The Block required subtitles over in the States, Irish horror-comedy Grabbers is going to need a translator situated in every second cinema seat.


Can you believe a filmmaker like Paul Thomas Anderson has trouble getting funding, yet Paul W.S. Anderson has money shovelled down his craw until it comes out the other end as a Resident Evil movie? Filming of The Master was delayed for nearly a year due to budgetary concerns, but now we've got a first trailer and, as expected, it looks a bit spesh. Dive in:


Oh my God you guys - check out this video that was in the 'related videos' grid after I somehow made it all the way through the Bachelorette trailer:


Pro-tip: if you don't fancy forking out to see The Campaign at a cinema, simply follow Will Ferrell around making those Cesar 'Dog Whisperer' Millan "tsst" noises until he gets mad and starts shouting obscenities at you - it's more or less the same thing. Ah, our lawyers have just advised me to say you should not follow Mr. Ferrell anywhere. Please don't do that.


I still think Berberian Sound Studio could broaden its appeal by changing the first word to 'Barbarian' and giving all the characters swords.


So I guess this is the biggie. Man Of Steel debuts with not one, but two trailers - narrated by Pa-Kent (Kevin Costner) and Jor-El (Russell Crowe) respectively. I know it's too early to say but the tone set by Zak Snyder seems to be a bit "Dawson_crying.gif". Is an emotion-drenched Superman film really what people want to see? Superman Returns suffered from a distinct lack of fun. People loved Christopher Reeve in the role because he used his superpowers to look through Lois Lane's clothes, and gave a dude brain damage to celebrate getting his powers back like a boss. Now name something Brandon Routh's Superman did. Exactly. If I wanted emotions I could see them at home.



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