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  • Review: Too Old To Die Young wallows in neon-soaked misery

    TV Review | Luke Whiston | 22nd October 2019

    "It's been 84 years..."
    I gaze out upon the tundra, the sun slipping over the horizon as a bitter wind blasts ice shards across the landscape. I'm reminded of the seasons which have preceded me in the days, weeks and months now consigned to the past, and of the brave men and women who have made the ultimate sacrifice on this arduous journey, of which I am the sole remaining survivor. We lost our captain early, driven mad by the unerring stillness. Five crew perished recovering a password. The first mate ventured outside searching for spare HDMI cables some days ago, never to return. But I write this final entry with a note of triumph in my heart - final, because once my frost-bitten hands have rested my pen I too shall be taking a stroll into the darkness, but not before making one last entry: I did it. I finished watching Nicolas Winding Refn's Amazon Prime Original series Too Old to Die Young.

  • The Apprentice: season 15, episode 3 recap: "Toys Toys Toys, I'm Looking for a Good Time"

    TV Feature | Ed Williamson | 20th October 2019

    Ooh, a race row, this ought to give the whole thing a much-needed positivity shot in the arm.

  • The Apprentice: season 15, episode 2 recap: "Brain Freeze"

    TV Feature | Becky Suter | 12th October 2019

    This has been a burden on my life for a few years now and I have finally got to the bottom of it. Over the past five years I have been posting a series of false stories to see if they made their way onto The Shiznit. And you know what, they did! The story about the ‘Fat Daddy’ fitness video fitness video, the story about the incredibly sexist board game and then the story about about the children’s party business which nearly killed a woman. It’s been tough not keeping these to myself and making comments, especially when it’s Ed’s turn to write an episode and I think of a good pun for the title. However, I had to. Now I know for certain. I have saved and screenshotted all my original stories which clearly show just one person has viewed them. It’s............your mum.

  • The Apprentice: season 15, episode 1 recap: "The Cape of No Hope"

    TV Feature | Ed Williamson | 6th October 2019

    They're all here again, and again, and again. The token posh guy and girl; the cockney salesman who's the most self-aware and grounded but startlingly aggressive whenever he has to sell anyone something; the gold-star recruitment consultants who ironically have no understanding of the sort of personality likely to win over potential employers. I wish they weren't. I wish it would all stop.

  • Maybe the real Love Island is the friends we made on the way...

    TV Feature | Becky Suter | 29th July 2019

    Love. Above all things I believe in love. Love is like oxygen. Love is a many splendored thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love. Every time I say it’s going to be different, I won’t get in too deep. Don’t fall for it, Becky: it’s infatuation, not love. Empires have fallen, glacial caps have melted and I’ve been oblivious to it all. I’ve fallen for the charms of Love Island. I've gone full factor 50.

  • Apropos of nothing, let's revisit Dr Horrible's Sing-Along Blog: Commentary! - The Musical

    TV Feature | Matt Looker | 12th June 2019

    Now that films like La La Land and The Greatest Showman are being celebrated for inventing the musical, it’s time to reappraise the best thing to ever come singing out of the Whedonverse. No, not Once More With Feeling. And no, not Dr Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog. I’m obviously talking about Dr Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog: Commentary! – The Musical. But you knew that already. It's in the title. Come with me on a terribly niche journey...

  • Review: Game of Thrones bows out burning bridges, own fingers, everything

    TV Review | Luke Whiston | 21st May 2019

    So now that the Marvel Cinematic Universe and Game of Thrones are at an end - two of the most popular, costliest and consistently epic franchises to ever exist in film and TV - and we've chewed over when and how to talk about them online, are we at some kind of 'spoiler event horizon' or a 'spoiler singularity'? I don't know either, just wanted to say something that sounded clever. Tits and willies and dragons eh, cor!

  • Review: After Life is not deft enough to avoid causing friendly fire

    TV Review | Ed Williamson | 22nd March 2019

    To promote his new Netflix show After Life, Ricky Gervais is out doing the podcast rounds, and telling anyone who'll listen why people who are offended by any of his jokes must have misunderstood them. He's probably right in some cases. But what he never considers, or at least never acknowledges, is that if a lot of people are misunderstanding your jokes, maybe it's because you aren't skilled enough at delivering them.

  • Leaving Neverland and our need for chaos

    TV Feature | Ed Williamson | 8th March 2019

    In the summer of 2002 Michael Jackson came to Exeter, my hometown, where I was living again having just finished university. In a series of events that are ludicrous in hindsight, some businessmen had bought Exeter City FC out of administration and installed Uri Geller as a co-chairman. Geller duly brought Jackson and David Blaine down for a public appearance, in which they drove round the pitch in an open-topped car with a load of children.

    I didn't go. But I do remember watching it on TV, noting that, despite the hit his image had taken from the Jordy Chandler trial, he was still surrounding himself with children wherever he went. And thinking: "No one in this guy's life ever pulls him aside and says, 'Listen, Mick: maybe ease up on the kids in public, eh?'"

  • The Apprentice: season 14, episode 12 recap: "High Nut Content"

    TV Feature | Ed Williamson | 18th December 2018

    It's drawing to its close and we're all better people: informed, educated and entertained. Let's build on this experience and learn to live together in harmony, then burn the world in a big skip.