Rewriting the synopsis of Our Souls At Night, the title of an actual film

If you are British, you are probably already laughing at that title. If you're American, you're probably wondering what all the fuss is about. If so, please read this tweaked synopsis, which I punched up to play to the film's biggest strength: its amazing title.

"OUR SOULS At Night is set in Colorado and begins when Addie Moore (Jane Fonda) SNIFFS AROUND to pay a CHEEKY visit to a neighbour, Louis Waters (Robert Redford). Her husband died years ago in a BUM DEAL, while his wife pASSed away, which was really SHITTY. In such a small WINDY town they'd been neighbours for decades, living mere steps from one another's BACK DOORS, but they had been TUSHY to make contact. Their children live far away in the BACKSIDE of town, which STINKS, leaving Addie and Louis all alone in their BIG AIRY HOUSES. After a chance encounter BEHIND the REAR END of their properties, Addie seeks to establish a BOOTY call, BUTT HOLE portions of the town raise all sorts of GUFF and HOT AIR. The pair decide to make ANUS start and make the most of the time they have together. SPHINCTERS."
Our Souls At Night (snigger) will launch on Netflix on 29th September. Parp.