An update on Taken 2, just because


15th October 2011

It's the movie that isn't The Avengers or all the other best films from next year that everyone's sort of talking about!

Luc Besson has spent the best part of the last 20 years producing unremarkable Eurotrash action thrillers, so he must have been more surprised than anyone in 2008 when Taken made $226 million worldwide and made an action hero out of Liam Neeson (even if, judging from his pained grimace in every action film since, he'd probably just like a nice sit-down in a biopic or two).

The movie's success made a sequel a SUREFIRE INEVITABILITY, and despite our foolish suggestions for a plot, here we are three years later, staring down the barrel of a Taken 2 synopsis, courtesy of Den Of Geek.

"Liam Neeson returns as Bryan Mills, the retired CIA agent with a particular set of skills who stopped at nothing to save his daughter Kim from Albanian kidnappers.

"When the father of one of the kidnappers swears revenge, and takes Bryan and his wife hostage during their family vacation in Istanbul, Bryan enlists Kim to help them escape, and uses the same advanced level of special forces tactics to get his family to safety and systematically take out the kidnappers one by one."
The aforementioned father about to be Neesowned is to be played by Rade Sherbedgia (below left), a Croatian-born actor of some merit, whose inclusion is marred by the fact he looks eerily like Liam Neeson in a fake moustache and glasses. Hope I didn't just spoil the movie's big twist.

Add your own slide whistle sound effect.

All of this pointless giffery is just a smokescreen for me to toot my own horn and cry foul that my suggestion for a title - Taken 2: The Cleaners - was blatantly ignored by Besson and co. Tsk, the French. They wouldn't know a good idea if it invaded them in a land war.

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