Kevin Smith 'too fat to fly'


15th February 2010

Clerks director Kevin Smith was thrown off a commercial airliner at the weekend as his weight was considered a safety risk. Fly, fatass, fly!

I won't make a point of writing news updates about personal stories instead of professional ones, but this one's literally too juicy to let fly. As anyone who subscribes to his Twitter feed can no doubt confirm, rotund director Kevin Smith has exploded in rage after being yoinked off a Southwest Air flight over the weekend. The reason? The self-styled "tubby bitch" was deemed 'too fat to fly'.

Regardless what you think of Smith's movies, in person he comes across as personable and genuine - if alarmingly forthright at times - but he's certainly not the kind to kick up a stink in public, and certainly not the kind to play the 'celebrity' card. Here's the opening rant of his Tweetathon:

"Dear @SouthwestAir - I know I'm fat, but was Captain Leysath really justified in throwing me off a flight for which I was already seated? I flew out in one seat, but right after issuing me a standby ticket, Oakland Southwest attendant Suzanne (wouldn't give last name) told me Captain Leysath deemed me a "safety risk".

Again: I'm way fat... But I'm not THERE just yet. But if I am, why wait til my bag is up, and I'm seated WITH ARM RESTS DOWN. In front of a packed plane with a bunch of folks who'd already ID'ed me as "Silent Bob."

So, @SouthwestAir, go fuck yourself. I broke no regulation, offered no "safety risk" (what, was I gonna roll on a fellow passenger?). I was wrongly ejected from the flight (even Suzanne eventually agreed). And fuck your apologetic $100 voucher, @SouthwestAir. Thank God I don't embarrass easily (bless you, JERSEY GIRL training). But I don't sulk off either: so everyday, some new fuck-you Tweets for @SouthwestAir."
There then follows a stream of over 100 further tweets, in which Smith tries his hardest to embarrass himself, including - but not limited to - claiming there were fatter people than him on the flight; posting Photoshopped pictures of other fat people on flights; calling out individual staff members of SouthWest Air; responding and berating to people who disagree with him (and posting pictures of them and calling them fat); and generally just pissing his dignity down the drain.

As it happens, I think Smith is in the right: if he was a safety risk, why let him on the plane in the first place? But damn, if having an active Twitter feed isn't the easiest way to burn all your goodwill like goddamn jet fuel. There really is no such thing as a private matter any more.

But then, this is coming from the man who routinely posts updates on his wife's "pooter". I think I prefer him as Silent Bob.

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