Magic 8-Ball the movie: all signs point to obvious jokes


28th April 2010

Paramount are making a Magic 8-Ball movie, which is odd, because usually it's the Magic 8-Ball that decides which movies they're going to make. Another Shrek movie? Outlook is good!

It's hard to maintain one's credibility raging over a movie based on a child's toy, but it's halfway understandable when said toy at least has an element of gaming involved. Transformers transform. Battleship has battleships. Even Monopoly has characters. But a movie based on Magic 8-Ball - a glorified 20-sided set of dice? Jesus. Ball In A Cup: The Movie is surely only a few weeks away.

Vulture revealed the news, saying that Paramount are hoping to transform the franchise into a National Treasure-style action-adventure movie. I'm not sure which is more depressing: the fact we're discussing this at all, or that National Treasure is now the benchmark for modern action-adventures.

In all honesty, this is barely newsworthy - just another headline to pretend to be outraged over. The trick with these toy movies is to simply apply a brand name to a cookie-cutter storyline and you have an instant brand recognition.

It's not really harming anyone, because a person who gets worked up over a movie based on a toy they played with 20 years ago probably isn't allowed to have anything with sharp edges anyway.

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