Oh alright here's that Star Wars Empire Theme barking dog video

I wonder how hard they had to hit them? The people who autotuned and composited this advert together I mean.

Right. I'm going to try and write up this depressing little piece of non-news without referencing the brand it promotes, even though you can clearly see it in the video title. If I don't say it out loud on the page then it doesn't count towards their brand recognition, right? Somehow that feels like a victory. Go us!

I'll be honest: my intention is to bait google with a keyword-laced title. It's in an H1 tag and everything, how can this plan fail? In fact I'm so sure we'll be web millionaires because of this one post that I've just quit my job. Well, left a voice message. Coincidentally, does anyone know how to break into an office and switch a microcassette in an answering machine? Guys?

Urgh:



The stain on my soul, it won't come off!



Look at that - I typed the brand name but it's in an image, therefore rendering any attempts by search engines to associate this post with Star Wars and the brand in question useless. HA I BEAT YOU, THE SYSTEM!!1!
Actually I'd like to take this opportunity to address something that has always bugged me. Yes, Star Wars has evolved into an insanely huge franchise, and as such requires money from endorsements to keep people employed. But this recent rash of adverts featuring some of the most recognisable and beloved movie characters of all time promoting products with no connection to the Star Wars Universe is nothing new.

Check out this advert from 1980 for a range of Star Wars pants for kids - Lucas (the default blame-receiver for anything Star Wars and crappy) was already milking the cash cow way back then. Don't check it out too hard and for too long, though, because your girlfriend might walk into the room unexpectedly and there'll be an awkward silence for the rest of the evening.