Trailer: The Three Musketeers looks suitably ridiculous


27th March 2011

Unsurprisingly, given that it's from the director of the Resident Evil franchise, historical accuracy is not high on the agenda. Sword-sporting gimps and giant airships on the other hand? YO.

Paul WS Anderson's take on The Three Musketeers will probably be no better or worse than any of the other two dozen versions that have been released in the last century, although it has one thing that the others didn't: Milla Jovovich doing a slow-motion limbo-dive through a corridor of ye olde ball-bearing traps. Take that, Alexandre Dumbass.

To be fair, ridiculous action set-pieces (SHOT IN 3D, in case you didn't notice) and oversized weaponry are par from the course in Andersonville, and this version has a pretty impressive cast on paper at least. It stars Matthew MacFadyen, Ray Stevenson and Luke Evans as the Musketeers, Percy Jackson twerp Logan Lerman as Dogtanian and - get this - Christoph Waltz, Mads Mikkelsen AND an effete Orlando Bloom as a triumvirate of villains. If they're not bad guys you can boo and hiss at, we're in trouble.

Of course, it's nothing compared to the 1993 version of The Three Musketeers, starring... Well, see for yourself.

A pre-warlock Charlie Sheen? Jack Bauer? Robin? The fat guy from 2012? TIM CURRY? Check and mate, Mr Anderson.

Never forget.

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