Review: Jennifer's Body

Not wanting to refuel the can she/can't she act, but I saw this at the weekend.

She can't.

At least not while she's still playing roles that require her to show as much flesh as possible without pre-empting that career-downward trick of the 'bare-all'.

Now is the time to prove yourself, Ms Fox.

my bad, put the comment in the wrong place, wanted to post it under next article...

Edited at 20:57 on 10/11/09

Thanks, tell your friends.

Although that reminds me, the DVD bit has been broken for weeks...but Modern Warfare 2 is waiting at home...ngghhhh

And as an aside, that's a nice half-ad half-feature you got there with the "out this week" thing. Kudos.

<further derailing>
So do you guys think Pacino/DeNiro will ever make another good movie in their life time?
</further derailing>

Ray Liotta is awesome in Narc, well worth checking out. Also: Turbulence. Just kidding. Or am I? Even I can't tell anymore.

Not defending Megan Fox's acting ability but it'd suck if you were an actor and the only films you'd been able to prove yourself in were Transformer movies. You might as well be an extra.

The trick is to do the dog flick early on in your career, like Tom Hanks, so your movies can only get better.

Having said that, my fave Hanks film has always been Bachelor Party...

True about Liotta, absolutely stunning in Goodfellas but slipped off since.
Slater showed so much promise as a young Jack Nicholson type...I think you can begin to chart his demise when he made that film with the dog. You can't act with a dog and recover from that.
Even Owen Wilson tried to top himself after a canine movie

What can I say, Goaty? Some actors seem to show promise, and then they fizzle after they make a couple of movies. Take Ray Liotta, who starred (and nailed) in one of the most successful (by that I mean, critique wise and legacy wise) movies in history, and well, I can't remember him in anything else, except for the odd Friends episode. Think of Patrick Swayze, too. Any others? (Now, I'm aware Slater doesn't exactly fit the bill I'm presenting, because he was in plenty of film, but never quite made it to the A-listers of cinema, but still)

I genuinely don't know how I went from a horror movie to handjobs outside biker bars. It's like jazz-rage, freeform bile with no connecting notes. It's 4:30am and now I want to watch Heathers & Pump Up The Volume. Christian Slater used to be good, what happened?

My eyes are indeed green, but I am in no way jealous of Megan Fox. Whose level of attractiveness I am not mentioning.
I was a better actress than her when I was 13.

I wholeheartedly agree with almost everything you say in this rant Master Goat, but I swear to god, if you don't leave John Krasinski alone, I'll swim back to England and frown at you from outside a window.

I want to remake Heathers. I want to be Martha Dumptruck.

People feel compelled to reject her because other people are seemingly also constantly compelled to state how attractive they think she is. And I'm going to do that exactly that right now

Megan Fox is a fucking knock out.

Now Heathers, that was a movie.

When's the remake due..?

It's like Buckaroo but with a goat.

I have no opinion on the film.

I love these strange little things that set you off. A picture of a man wearing a coat. A review of a horror film that sees you ranting Southend tosspots in Vauxhall Vectras.

You really are the angriest man in the world.

I have no idea where that came from but I feel better for it. I'm still seething about #that# bloke in the coat from the indie film that isn't. If he mated with Fox, it could herald the end of the world as we know it.

I think people feel compelled, as Nick says, to mention whether they think she's hot or not because that's her entire reason for existence in Hollywood. Even the lead-in to this article "full-time erection facilitator" reduces her involvement to "I'd fuck her, therefore I'll pay to watch her in a movie".

I'm not criticising you for that, because it's exactly the level of artistic merit Megan Fox deserves. She's a 3rd rate Angelina Jolie, has that whole brunette vamp thing going on except, from what I've read, doesn't possess the intelligence of Jolie.
And when *that* is a criticism, you're pretty fucked as a human being "yeah she's hot but not as clever as Brangelina".

Watched a bit of Transformers but not long enough for her to enter the film, haven't seen her in anything. But I've seen her face and almost-topless pics leering at me from just about every wank-mag-for-commuters (Maxim, FHM etc) for what feels like an eternity.
Don't care if she can act or not, the sorts of films she makes aren't on my radar.
And as for whether I'd fuck her or not, there are thousands of skinny brunettes with shitty tattoos the world over. Take a stroll down any high street at 3am and you'll see hundreds of exactly the same girl, drunkenly staggering and flashing their tits to the "Cops in Cars" programmes that litter the after-12pm programme list.

And "tits" is justified in that context, crude and emotionless, worthy of nothing more than a horn-smash from chimps that drive down Southend Seafront with their assface music pumping from their assface Vauxhall fucking Novas.

Just because you work out, snort cocaine and like, totally kiss women and stuff (see my pics on myspace!!!!!) etc etc, doesn't make you worthy of anything other than a heroin-stupoured $20 handjob out back of a biker bar whilst 5 whooping Hells Angels stand around and film it for youtube.

Megan Fox may be a nice person, never met her.
But as a sex object? Don't make me fucking laugh. Maybe to hormonal teenagers who have never had a blowjob and think they would ever stand a chance with her.

Megan Fox/Lindsey Lohan/Paris Hilton/Elf Geldof - they're all the same person.
This just looks like a spastic version of the single best teen-angst horror movie ever made.
"Heathers"

How very.

People feel compelled to reject her because other people are seemingly also constantly compelled to state how attractive they think she is. And I'm going to do that exactly that right now

Megan Fox is nothing special in the looks department

There, take that!

And yes, Bound is great.

I find it strange how people feel compelled to state how they don't find Megan Fox attractive wherever her name is mentioned. This isn't Hot or Not.

Agree with criticism of lesbo-love - totally gratuitous and unnecessary (but also secretly awesome). Bound is cracking.

Saucer of milk for table green-eyes please

And I agree, hot lesbian kissing is absolutely not needed. If you have to drop that into a film, it's a sure sign it's not got much else going for it.
Except for "Bound", which was the most excellent thriller with same-sex kissing ever.

Adam Brody is awesome, I've always thought that. One of the (many) highlights in Thank You For Smoking.

Despite the potential Brodacious-ness ... sorry that was awful..., I have no desire whatsoever to watch this film.

NO "you go girls". You stop girls. Despite being written, directed and starring lllllladies there is nothing in this film that speaks to me as a woman. Fuck sake, it's making me sound like Rosie O'Donnell. I hate this movie.
Gratuitous girl-on-girl kissing really annoys me. It's the new black. There are other ways to imply and/or show same sex sexual tension without swapping spit. See ALL OF TOP GUN.

I find it genuinely hard to believe that Fox can act, having seen no evidence of this whatsoever in any of the tv shows or films she's been in. I have nothing against her having a hot body - well done that girl - but there must be equally hot, less vapid, girls out there in actor land. Surely they can't work Hollywood on a "one in one out" system. It's not a Chicago Rock for crying out loud.

By the way, imho Megan Fox is plastic-fantasic, nothing special whatsoever.