Feature

10 things John Travolta looks like on his new poster

Ali Gray

10th May 2016

Sometimes movie posters just ask for it.

Stop what you're doing everyone, because there's a new John Travolta movie out called I Am Wrath and it promises to be every bit as ridiculous as John Travolta's last one thousand movies. The movie itself seems pay-chequey enough - actual tagline: "A man is out for justice after a group of corrupt police officers are unable to catch his wife's killer" - but the poster has just been beamed in from whatever planet Travolta calls home and HOLY SHIT do we not deserve this baby.

Click image for full-size picture


Wow. Wowsers trousers. That is certainly a fair approximation of what human beings look like. Travolta looks like he has just realised hours after the fact that if his wig salesman is supposed to be so great, how come the salesman's own wig looked so terrible?

Here are 10 other things that John Travolta looks like in this poster for I Am Wrath, which is available now in all good newsagents and all evil ones too.
Jack Reacher's less successful brother, Ron Reacher



A police composite of John Travolta come to life



A character from an off-brand version of Guess Who



A bear who is not happy he was recently turned into a human



A Walnut Whip



A character from a poorly-received PS2 videogame about London gangsters, voiced by Craig Fairbrass



Nic Cage wearing a John Travolta face mask



A man who got halfway through cosplaying as Solid Snake when he received a phone call asking him to go and identify a body at the morgue



A Britain First politician



Steven Seagal as Steven Seagal sees himself


Bonus lookalike: A fairground caricature of Ron Reacher drawn by a cartoonist who knows deep down he can't pay the bills with his art.

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