Monster Squad to be remade

Another reason to kick Hollywood in the nards.

Remember The Monster Squad? It was The Goonies fighting classic Universal monsters like Dracula, Frankenstein, the Mummy, Wolf Man and...erm...the Creature from the Black Lagoon. And for all its 80s hokiness, it was fun.

Plus it has the honour of being an early writing gig for Shane Black, before he wrote cool movies with swearing in and "your wife is so fat" jokes.

And now, it's going to be remade...by Michael Bay's production company Platinum Dunes, no less. I can imagine it now: a group of quirky kids takes to the skies in a helicopter to track down Dracula armed only with a rocket launcher full of explosive garlic. And they'll be led by super-cool Jaden Smith. Or maybe Taylor Lautner has a little brother?

And in the background Megan Fox will still be trying to get bird shit off Bay's Ferrari.

What this does mean though is that Platinum Dunes has cleverly hit upon a money-spinning double-whammy: capitalising on the recent vampire/werewolves trend, whilst also introducing a new character for Hollywood to flog to death: the Creature of the Black Lagoon a.k.a. Gill-man.

Somebody get Dwayne Johnson on the phone - only such a hulking figure can portray this terrifying monster!


Oh, that's it.