Rip Torn tried to rob a bank

Seriously.

Anytime a publication calls some noodle-dicked pillow-biter like Ashton Kutcher or Chace Crawford a 'bad boy', I can't help but think the older generations of Hollywood hellraisers would snap these assholes in two and use them as shoe-horns. This story reinforces exactly that theory.

Rip Torn has always flirted with 'Nick Nolte' levels of insanity, but his latest arrest really takes the cake. Described by police as "highly intoxicated", Torn was busted after breaking into a Connecticut bank on Friday at 9.40pm, complete with a loaded gun. A. Loaded. Gun. Holy shit.

Torn is 78 and has a history of alcholism, so obviously this is no laughing matter - this is a story that's an itchy trigger finger away from being tragic. But damn: getting loaded and trying to hold up a bank? After it's closed? That's some A1 lunacy right there.

Torn was charged with carrying a gun without a permit, carrying a firearm while intoxicated, first-degree burglary and criminal mischief. Also, he got a ticking off for being in Men In Black II, but was not officially charged.

Meanwhile, Hollywood 'bad boy' Bradley Cooper heroically defeated a spider after a three-hour standoff over the weekend. "I kept screaming at it, but it just wouldn't get off my hair dryer," he claimed.