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Sylvester Stallone

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Create your own Expendables villain!

Posted by Ali Gray, Luke Whiston at 16:30 on 15 Aug 2014
Create your own Expendables villain!
As you've no doubt seen discussed on The Pirate Bay, The Expendables 3 hits cinemas this week. It's a franchise famous for overblown action, probable steroid abuse and dubious berets, but above all else, it's famous for its ridiculous character names. Joining Lee Christmas, Hale Caesar and Toll Road is Mel Gibson's villain: Conrad Stonebanks. Let the swill around your mouth for a few minutes.

50 fun facts you didn't know about The Expendables or maybe you did

Posted by Ali Gray at 09:00 on 11 Aug 2014
50 fun facts you didn't know about The Expendables or maybe you did
You'd think by now, with three Expendables movies under his Expendabelt, we'd know all there is to know about Sylvester Stallone, Barney Ross and his motley crew of mercenaries. You'd be wrong: DEAD WRONG. Because they are mysteries wrapped in enigmas wrapped in delicious sausagemeat. Here are 50 things you could never conceivably have known about The Expendables, you close-minded little shrimps.

Review: The Expendables 3

Posted by Becky Mather at 12:30 on 06 Aug 2014
The Expendables 3
In The Expendables 3, grizzled veteran Barney Ross (Sylvester Stallone) faces an existential crisis after miraculously cheating death and battling the ravages of age, and is ultimately forced to put his demons to rest to defeat a former ally who has gone rogue. Oh, and literally blow the shit up out of everything he passes.

Expendables stand in front of and on top of large truck during gun-fight

Posted by Ali Gray at 12:30 on 06 Jun 2014
Expendables stand in front of and on top of large truck during gun-fight
I can't help but think standing behind it might be a smarter idea while under heavy fire, but then I'm not an Expendable and I never will be.

It's like all The Expendables died

Posted by Ali Gray at 19:30 on 03 Apr 2014


These new Expendables 3 posters make it look like the entire cast died of an unexpected heart attack en masse. Especially if you listen to this.

Review: Grudge Match

Posted by Ed Williamson at 12:00 on 24 Jan 2014
Grudge Match
You join me as I battle the triple threat of fatigue, hangover and a burgeoning cold in attempting to semi-satisfactorily review Grudge Match in the two hours I have before I collapse. This tight schedule is caused by a three-night midweek run in which I saw the film, then contributed drunkenly to Team Shiznit's glorious triumph at the Picturehouse Podcast Comedy Film Quiz, and now am attempting to write the review by the release date. Now, when a film is press-screened three days before it comes out, you fear the worst, but they needn't have worried: Grudge Match is pretty good fun when it bothers trying.

In pictures: Why Sly Stallone and Richard Gere don't get on

Posted by Ali Gray at 22:00 on 14 Dec 2013
In pictures: Why Sly Stallone and Richard Gere don't get on
While researching a feature for some place else, I stumbled on a truly amazing Sylvester Stallone anecdote about the time he pissed off Richard Gere on the set of grammatically dubious teen movie, The Lord's Of Flatbush. I decided to illustrate it for your viewing pleasure. Read this in his voice and it's ten times more amazing.

Review: Bullet To The Head

Posted by Ali at 22:00 on 27 Jan 2013
Bullet To The Head
The best thing about Bullet To The Head is that it is only 91 minutes long. I've watched so many three-hour, awards-worthy epics this month, I was expecting the final fight between Sylvester Stallone and villain Jason Momoa to be the catalyst that actually gets the story started. Brevity is hardly a big selling point, but know this: Bullet To The Head is short, sharp and to the point, if the point is Sly Stallone punching, kicking and stabbing people quite violently.

Win Expendables 2, then celebrate by snapping someone's neck clean off

Posted by Matt at 22:00 on 04 Dec 2012
Win Expendables 2, then celebrate by snapping someone's neck clean off
Do you like watching old men fight each other to the death? Then we have the competition for you!

Crack the code for exciting Expendables 3 news

Posted by Matt at 14:00 on 06 Nov 2012
Crack the code for exciting Expendables 3 news
Exciting, new viral marketing for a tired, old, virile franchise has begun. Can you decipher Sly Stallone's baffling code to reveal some top casting choices for Expendables 3?
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