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Marvel

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Review: Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2

Posted by Matt Looker at 20:00 on 01 May 2017
Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2
While fans continue to squabble over the correct, surely-soon-to-be-official 'Ultimate Ranking of MCU films' (nearly there, guys! Seriously, you're doing great work), it's easy to overlook the fact that, at this stage, the Marvel movie-making model looks unlikely to ever produce a truly bad film. Sure, there have been Dark Elvish messes and Mickey Rourke-sized hiccups, but Marvel really has its mathematically-safe, formulaic shit together now and, as a result, always delivers an agreeable level of fun and action albeit without taking any real risks. That is, except for Guardians Of The Galaxy, the only property in the Universe that still feels like a gamble, sitting apart from the homogenised Avenger adventures to follow its own completely different set of rules. Which is why it's a shame that this sequel follows them too.

Review: Doctor Strange

Posted by Ali Gray at 20:15 on 03 Nov 2016
Doctor Strange
Considering the X-Men movies can't even stay consistent one movie to the next, it's a minor miracle the Marvel Cinematic Universe remains a cohesive whole, 8 years and 14 movies after Nick Fury first asked Tony Stark to join his professional LinkedIn network. We've had men of technology, beasts of rage, Gods from other realms and soldiers forged in war, all now reading from the same script. The latest recruit to the MCU is Doctor Strange, who heralds the arrival of the world of magic, but - like Arrested Development's Gob Bluth and his Alliance of Magicians - demands to be taken seriously. Disbelief is being suspended at a comfortable level by now: if you're cool with purple space tyrants and talking raccoons, chances are the addition of sorcerers, supreme or otherwise, isn't going to upset the apple cart.

Review: X-Men: Apocalypse

Posted by Ali Gray at 22:46 on 19 May 2016
X-Men: Apocalypse
Forgive me for sounding like I'm on the company payroll, but have Marvel movies ruined superhero movies for everyone else? I fear they have. The Marvel Cinematic Universe made its own space in the superhero sphere; it owns the area marked 'fun'. DC, as a countermeasure to all the lousy fun everyone was enjoying, staked their claim on the 'serious' space; heroes with grim faces carved out of rock, pre-tantrum lip-wobble expressions lashed with rain. Where does this leave the X-Men? I'm sure I don't know anymore, because X-Men: Apocalypse attempts to be all things to all people and ends up being neither overtly fun or remotely serious, just entirely ridiculous. It feels like a superhero movie back from when no one really knew what that was supposed to mean, or, as a friend of mine put it so perfectly: "It's like a shit superhero movie from the nineties".

Review: Captain America: Civil War

Posted by Ali Gray at 14:00 on 05 May 2016
Captain America: Civil War
"So what is Vision?" I'm at the pub, still digesting Captain America: Civil War, and I've been caught off guard. "Well, he's... um...he's a, er... so Thor had this sort of bath, then Ultron, erm... You know the Mind Gem, th-..." Christ, I'm racking my brains and his first movie only came out a year ago. Marvel movies move pretty fast; if you don't re-watch regularly, or God forbid miss a movie, your pub trivia game will suffer. (My best guess: Vision is a space ghost fruit roll-up robot butler dressed by George at Asda). Civil War is the 13th movie in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and if you haven't been paying attention over the last eight years, you're going to find it really, really hard to keep up. The MCU doesn't slow down, doesn't pull its punches and doesn't really do 'Previously, on the Marvel Cinematic Universe..." It has unapologetically and unreservedly been constructed from the ground up for fans - and those fans are going to go bend-over-backwards apeshit crazy for Civil War, arguably the movie that the previous 12 have all been working towards.

Man who saw Civil War to share definitive MCU rankings

Posted by Matt Looker at 07:00 on 03 May 2016
Man who saw Civil War to share definitive MCU rankings
"Just seen Captain America: Civil War. Need to revise my MCU rankings!!" a man promised his legions of Facebook friends this weekend and now the Internet has halted to a standstill awaiting what will surely be the definitive list of Marvel Cinematic Universe films, ordered by quality.

PLACEHOLDER: 5-star Civil War review [pending Marvel payment] ***DO NOT PUBLISH***

Posted by Ali Gray at 10:00 on 18 Apr 2016
PLACEHOLDER: 5-star Civil War review [pending Marvel payment] ***DO NOT PUBLISH***
Hi guys, just to let you know, the marketing arm of Marvel have been in contact with me as they have with all of the UK press to offer The Shiznit payment for giving Captain America: Civil War a positive review. I'm sure you remember that they already paid us the first £5,000 for giving Batman V Superman a negative review, but they've confirmed that the rest of the bribe will be delivered upon publication of our Civil War review, which I'm seeing tomorrow. Not that it matters.

Finding five nerd rage moments in the new Civil War trailer

Posted by Matt Looker at 07:00 on 11 Mar 2016
Finding five nerd rage moments in the new Civil War trailer
Marvel have released a new trailer for Captain America: Civil War and it showcases thrilling action, real investment in emotional plot beats and an awesome first look at our brand new Spider-Man. The problem is, it has been met with overwhelming excitement and positivity. Don't they know that the Internet wasn't built to sustain such a thing?

Shock: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 made by same people as Vol. 1

Posted by Ali Gray at 13:30 on 17 Feb 2016
Shock: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 made by same people as Vol. 1
Is all this really necessary? Next you'll be telling me Star Wars: Episode VIII features some of the characters from Star Wars: Episode VII. Some but not all. Too soon? Too soon.

Marvel Civil War concept art confirms Hawkeye is still completely ineffective

Posted by Matt Looker at 14:02 on 05 Jan 2016
Marvel Civil War concept art confirms Hawkeye is still completely ineffective
Reports say that Hawkeye will spend the entire film muttering to himself "Just look busy, just look busy!"

Review: Ant-Man

Posted by Matt Looker at 20:00 on 08 Jul 2015
Ant-Man
More than any of its other movies to date, it seems that Marvel has been really savvy with this film. After all, it has completely turned around our expectations. Remember when we were outraged at Edgar Wright leaving due to “creative differences”? Remember when we sharpened our caps-lock ready for whatever half-assed generic borefest followed? Slowly, but surely, Marvel have won us all over with some neat trailers, some fun marketing and the sheer force of Paul Rudd’s lovable charisma. If that wasn't proof enough that Marvel just know exactly what the fuck they are doing with what they have, the finished movie also happens be rather ace. And that is no small achievement.
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