Sex

Review: Gainsbourg

As I sit back in the surprisingly comfortable chair of my local cinema, I realise there's nobody else in the theatre. I'm drinking a glass of red wine (it's one of those cinemas), I'm occasionally throwing handfuls of Wasabi Peas into my mouth (definitely one of those cinemas), and I'm about to watch the new biopic of serial shagger, Serge Gainsbourg. Things are gonna get pretty self-romantic and fast if another audience member doesn't get ushered in soon.

Review: Sex And The City 2

If you've seen the freaky poster for this movie, that should tell you all you need to know without having to purchase a ticket. This film is plastic, with no heart and very little brain. Fans of the TV series beware; this ill-advised sequel is a major letdown and it makes the first movie look like The Godfather in comparison.

Sex And The City 2 postOH MY GOD

Get your first look at the new poster for Sex And The City 2: Dubai Or Not Dubai. Warning: once seen cannot be unseen.

New Sex And The City 2 trailer

Ohmigod girls, did you see the new Sex And The City trailer? I know! [giggles] I can really relate to it! I am so like Samantha! Every time life gets me down I jet off to Abu Dhabi for a week all expenses paid.

Review: Chloe

Chloe opens with a breathy voiceover, red nail varnish, a healthy amount of side-boob and the rolling down of suspenders in an indistinct, soft-focus boudoir. Boom: suddenly I'm a newly pubescent teenager and furtively renting Bruce Willis erotic embarrassment Color Of Night. A film that, even at that tender age of 14 (I developed late), I knew was crap. All I wanted was some porny thrills, not the shattering realisation that it was possible NOT to enjoy a film. This revelation was up right up there with finding out there's no Santa. (Thanks a lot Gremlins... Again, I developed late.)

Showgirls 2 trailer

Warning: may actually just be porn.

First trailer for Middle Men: Luke Wilson's porn movie

A Luke Wilson sex movie? Could be worse: it could star Owen Wilson.

Sex And The City 2 movie trailer

Here is a trailer for Sex And The City 2. Don't ask me why, I honestly don't know.

Sex And The City 2 poster: Carrie on sucking

New poster for Sex And The City 2 confirms all male fears: this film is definitely happening.

Review: The Girlfriend Experience

A film about the exploits of a call girl starring a real-life porn star? Hot DAMN! Sign me up for that flick! Oh wait, it's an experimental 'artsy' film by Steven I'm-between-big-budget-movies Soderbergh. (*sigh*) Okay, I guess that's good too.