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Review: The Purge: Anarchy

Posted by Ali Gray at 23:15 on 18 Jul 2014
The Purge: Anarchy
The first Purge movie had a fantastic concept: that sometime in the near future, in order to pacify the populace for the rest of the year, all crime including murder would be legal for one night only. The biggest crime, however, was just how wasted the concept was on a home invasion storyline that barely ventured outside of Ethan Hawke's front door. Thankfully, this year's sequel The Purge: Anarchy goes some way into exploring that ridiculous concept to a more satisfying degree, and in pulling back to a wider angle to see the effect of The Purge on a whole city instead of a single household, it pulls off a pretty good impression of The Warriors to boot. It's time to come out to pla-aaay...

Official: all the good titles for horror movies have been taken

Posted by Ali Gray at 20:45 on 26 Oct 2013
Official: all the good titles for horror movies have been taken
So I was browsing new movie posters on the internet as usual, looking for something to belittle to make myself feel better, when I found a poster for a horror film called 'The Appearing'. As in a noun. Um... I think the word they were looking for was 'Apparition'. Except a film called The Apparition came out last year. It's official: there are no more cool-sounding words left to use in horror movie titles.

Review: No One Lives

Posted by Ed Williamson at 18:00 on 03 Sep 2013
No One Lives
WWE setting up a film studio is a fairly natural progression. It's been a conveyor belt to throw stars like Stone Cold Steve Austin and John Cena into cash-in action films, and now here it is with splatterfest No One Lives, featuring a minor role for wrestler George Murdoch. Fine by me, but remember when the wrestlers would do those promos to camera where they shouted angrily about the bodily harm they were about to do their opponent? Well, imagine a film in which everyone spoke like that throughout, then at some point came face-to-face with their own small intestine. Yep, you're there.

Review: The Dyatlov Pass Incident

Posted by Ed Williamson at 16:30 on 20 Aug 2013
The Dyatlov Pass Incident
The Hollyoaks late-night special was, on the surface, a glorious thing. Not only would the characters suddenly free themselves from the confines of decency that a pre-watershed airing imposed and begin to say words like "piss", there would also be a strong suggestion that you would see the breasts of the blondest cast member of the age. These goods were never delivered, but they do seem to have been the creative inspiration behind Gemma Atkinson's casting in The Dyatlov Pass Incident.

Buy tickets, fight cancer, save geeks

Posted by Ali at 10:00 on 18 Aug 2013
Buy tickets, fight cancer, save geeks
Den Of Geek present another night of scary stories from some of the UK's scariest storytellers - Paul Ross not included - and it's all to raise money for charity. Order your tickets now and enjoy a guilt-free Sunday.

Review: The Conjuring

Posted by Rob at 16:30 on 31 Jul 2013
The Conjuring
Take one old farm house, the more secluded the better; throw in a close-knit family excited about their new dream home; if they've got a young daughter prone to imaginary friends then that's absolute perfection. Chuck in a few slamming doors and kids yanked from their beds and you've got the recipe for a chilling, if unoriginal horror movie.

Review: Maniac

Posted by Ed Williamson at 12:00 on 15 Mar 2013
Maniac
At the screening of Maniac I attended, some journalist types were talking loudly beforehand about hanging prepositions. They were against them, and didn't care much for starting sentences with 'But', either. I resisted the temptation to interject with my view, which is that these tend to form ugly constructions but that arbitrary prohibitive attitudes towards grammar are the enemy of creativity. I don't want to antagonise anyone, after all. But anyway, Maniac is a film you should give a wide berth to.

Review: Mama

Posted by Ed Williamson at 09:00 on 20 Feb 2013
Mama
Just as Rob is now The Shiznit's go-to guy for dance movies, it seems I've somehow become the de facto horror critic around here. An unwise editorial decision at best: I'd only seen about six horror films before, and two of them were Ghostbusters in different aspect ratios. Here's a thing I've learned, though: there is a Spanish man called Guillermo del Toro who sneaks into edit bays and shoves his name in at the start of other people's films. But he seems to know his Spanish onions: Mama, the latest film he has credits-bombed, is pretty much triumphant from start to finish.

Review: V/H/S

Posted by Ed Williamson at 07:00 on 17 Jan 2013
V/H/S
Everyone stop filming yourselves doing everything. It inevitably ends in your murder. Then someone will find the footage and make money off it while you're in the cold, cold ground. Even worse, the footage won't even comprise a found footage movie: it'll end up being the footage someone finds in a found footage movie about people finding footage. And all people will ever say of you will be: "Sheesh, that guy sure went to great lengths to explain why he was filming himself."

A note to the makers of Silent Hill: Revelation

Posted by Ali at 12:00 on 01 Nov 2012
A note to the makers of Silent Hill: Revelation
Yes, I know he was in the Silent Hill games before he was in the movie. Still, I bet he reeks of cheddar.
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