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Review: Justice League

Posted by Ali Gray at 23:30 on 19 Nov 2017
Justice League
It wasn’t evil aliens that defeated the Justice League: it was facial hair.

Important investigation: what would Henry Cavill's Superman look like with a moustache?

Posted by Ali Gray at 07:30 on 25 Jul 2017
Important investigation: what would Henry Cavill's Superman look like with a moustache?
In the true spirit of investigative journalism, we recently learned that Henry Cavill will be sporting a moustache during his Justice League reshoots, so we set to work imagining what such a thing would look like. Screw you, Failing New York Times, that Pulitzer is mine.

An oral history of superhero actors complaining about going to the toilet

Posted by Ali Gray at 07:00 on 06 Jul 2017
An oral history of superhero actors complaining about going to the toilet
There's a strange, unspoken relationship between a journalist and a film star that absolutely nothing personal must be discussed during an interview. Except, that is, when that film star is playing a superhero, in which case it's absolutely on message to ask them exactly how they pissed and/or shat while wearing their super-suit. The weirdest thing is just how willing the actors are to share.

Suicide Squad, DC and the Warner Bros war against coherence

Posted by Ali Gray at 23:00 on 08 Aug 2016
Suicide Squad, DC and the Warner Bros war against coherence
It should be abundantly clear now to anyone with even a passing interest in superhero movies that the concept of the "shared universe" should be feared. Credit to Marvel: they took a big risk, did their groundwork and built up their shared universe by releasing not one but four successful individual franchises, before bringing them together like a corporate executive doing an overbite and interlocking his fingers in the universal sign language for 'synergy'. Everyone else saw The Avengers' box-office success and thought, 'Yeah, we'll have a bit of that. But sod all that hard work!' And thus, the very blueprint for superhero movies was torn up, sellotaped back together and plonked on the desks of finance departments throughout Hollywood.

Review: Batman v Superman: Dawn Of Justice

Posted by Matt Looker at 07:00 on 24 Mar 2016
Batman v Superman: Dawn Of Justice
The greatest gladiator match in the history of the world: God versus man.
By which, of course, I mean Zack Snyder, the all-powerful harbinger of wanton destruction, versus us, the humble cinema-goer, merely looking for some entertainment. Some cool stuff, for sure. Maybe even a joke of two. It's Student from the School of Michael Bay versus, say, Andy from Dagenham. Who will win?

Breakdown: Things you missed in the Wonder Woman first-look footage

Posted by Matt Looker at 07:00 on 20 Jan 2016
Breakdown: Things you missed in the Wonder Woman first-look footage
The first glimpse of Wonder Woman in all her inequality-correcting, leather-bodice-wearing glory has been released and it is fascinating. Like the true geeks and film buffs with one-of-a-kind expert knowledge that we are, here’s a deep-dive into the footage with wild speculation about some things that may happen at some point in the film or indeed ever.

Photo breakdown: Dissecting the new Batman v Superman pics

Posted by Matt Looker at 07:00 on 29 Jul 2015
Photo breakdown: Dissecting the new Batman v Superman pics
Yay for still images of characters we have already seen but in a different room and taken from a slightly different angle! [divider] It is a sad fact that we now live in an age where the release of three photos of established characters from a forthcoming blockbuster movie constitutes as Internet-breaking news. Luckily, we...

Momentous photo shoot proves that Ben Affleck is dead inside

Posted by Matt Looker at 21:41 on 15 Jul 2015
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Alternate theory: Ben Affleck didn't want to take part in Hollywood Reporter's stunt photo so they used a crash test dummy wearing a Ben Affleck mask and Jesse Eisenberg's jeans.

Batman to be taken in interesting new 'dark and gritty' direction

Posted by Matt Looker at 07:00 on 14 May 2014
Batman to be taken in interesting new 'dark and gritty' direction
Zack Snyder has released a first look at Ben Affleck as an all-new 'dark and brooding' Batman for Man Of Steel follow-up, Batman Vs. Superman. Until now, of course, the character has always been a fun and playful superhero, but this seems to be a bold new take on Batman. You can almost see him visibly thinking "Awww, man. My parents got killed. FUCK."

Fan excited for superhero movie face-off that is 756 days away

Posted by Ali Gray at 08:00 on 11 Apr 2014
Fan excited for superhero movie face-off that is 756 days away
A superhero movie fan has expressed tremendous excitement regarding the simultaneous release of Captain America 3 and Batman Vs Superman on the 6th of May, 2016, claiming he "can't wait to see who wins", blissfully ignoring the fact that the event is still 756 days away and he could feasibly accomplish many life-changing things in that time.
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