Latest TV News

Rake's on a plane

TV News | Ed Williamson | 7th March 2014

No, I've got nothing else; I just like that pun. Mad Men season seven is back on Sky Atlantic on Wednesday 16 April.

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Where's MY bloody Oscar, asks Todd Carty

TV News | Ed Williamson | 3rd March 2014

In a statement via his press officer earlier today, Todd Carty demanded to know why, when you're basically guaranteed an Oscar for playing anyone with AIDS, he never got one for playing Mark Fowler in Eastenders. A spokesman for Matthew McConaughey responded, surprisingly quickly, that Mark Fowler "only ever had HIV", which from an acting perspective was "a completely different kettle of fish". In response, a Carty representative said:

"
"
Yeah, fair enough.
McConaughey is said to have liked it when Mark tricked Nick Cotton into falling off the viaduct.

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Misprint ruins cover of Salman Rushdie's Game of Thrones novel

TV News | Ed Williamson | 27th February 2014

Must have taken the bloke ages to write. You'd think they could've at least spelled his name correctly.

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Just wait till he thinks he can sing, parents tell Cowell

TV News | Ed Williamson | 16th February 2014

Parents across the UK congratulated Simon Cowell on the birth of his son this weekend, while delighting in anticipation that the boy would one day want to pursue a singing career.

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Channel 5 drops Justified amid concerns it was good

TV News | Ed Williamson | 15th January 2014

Channel 5 today announced that it had no intention of broadcasting season five of Justified, having come to the conclusion that it was really very good and therefore not in-keeping with the channel's ethos.

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New record set for living in house with Jim Davidson

TV News | Ed Williamson | 9th January 2014

As the latest season of Celebrity Big Brother entered its seventh day this morning, the remaining contestants entered the Guinness Book of World Records for having continuously lived with Jim Davidson for longer than any other person, living or dead. The previous record was held by John Virgo, who managed a six-day stint on a Big Break promotional residency at a Butlins holiday camp in the early 1990s.

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Morse must escape cement in new Netflix exclusive episode

TV News | Ed Williamson | 7th January 2014

In an exciting new episode of Endeavour, the young Morse and Inspector Thursday are trapped in a room slowly filling with cement. Not really: the cycling image on the Netflix PS3 app screwed up and I had the time and ill-founded confidence in my readership to convince myself that a screengrab would look funny. Now let's all get on with our lives.

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zap2it.com gives strong endorsement of Scottish independence

TV News | Ed Williamson | 31st December 2013

In a move clearly intended to convey its support for the movement for an independent Scotland, zap2it.com yesterday posted a provocative article that refused to acknowledge that a Scottish accent is British. In doing so it joined the ranks of Scottish nationalist advocates for the cause that include Sir Sean Connery and The Proclaimers. "We're glad to have them on board," said Craig Proclaimer.

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Giamatti Downton role to comprise one photobomb

TV News | Ed Williamson | 5th December 2013

"His schedule was a bit tight, so we just got him to photobomb Shirley MacLaine and the guy who was a paedo headmaster in that episode of Cracker," confirmed Julian Fellowes, through mouthfuls of roast swan. "His hat is from my own collection. It is fashioned from pure gold."

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Cyrus X Factor performance needed tiresome controversy bid, say fans

TV News | Ed Williamson | 19th November 2013

Viewers were left non-plussed by the performance of Miley Cyrus on Saturday's edition of The X Factor, taking to social media to lament the absence of a transparent headline-grabbing stunt of some kind.

"It was hugely disappointing," wrote one. "I tuned in on the assumption that she might turn up on stage, get her bum out and stab a dwarf to death, or shit in her dungarees and use them like a catapult to fling it at the audience. But she just sat on this weird hill and sang a song about construction plant that I'm almost certain she isn't licensed to operate.

"A woman in her position has a duty to set feminism back by at least ten years with each appearance on television, and I for one will not stand for this."

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