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Here's that Vinnie Jones update you asked for

Posted by Matt Looker at 07:00 on 28 Aug 2014
Here's that Vinnie Jones update you asked for
I recently had reason to look at Vinnie Jones' IMDB page. I forget why now, because my brain has been dazzled by the sheer number of projects he currently has in the works. Brother be almost as busy as Eric Roberts.

Horrible interviews #346: Kelly Brook and Jake Lloyd

Posted by Matt Looker at 14:00 on 26 Aug 2014

Kelly Brook's incompetence, Jake Lloyd's cockiness, the 90s' garishness... it's the perfect shitstorm. Just because. (via @JimothyShondell)

Dead Snow 2 poster brings on the Lolocaust

Posted by Matt Looker at 14:00 on 21 Aug 2014
Dead Snow 2 poster brings on the Lolocaust
I am Goebbling up this Nazi pun. It falls right in Mein Kampfort zone. They've judged the tone just Reich. I hate myself.

New Shiznit film critic Michael Owen reviews this week's new releases

Posted by Michael Owen at 13:30 on 15 Aug 2014
New Shiznit film critic Michael Owen reviews this week's new releases
The internet did a collective snigger today when a Guardian interview revealed footballer-turned-pundit Michael Owen had only ever seen five films in his life, including Jurassic Park, Ghost and Heat. Because I'm a die hard Liverpool fan and I'm always keen to expand the horizons of fledgling film fans, I asked Michael if he was up for watching and reviewing five of this week's new releases, doubling his total. Unbelievably, he said yes! I know! I'm still in shock! Take it away, Michael Owen!

Create your own Expendables villain!

Posted by Ali Gray, Luke Whiston at 16:30 on 15 Aug 2014
Create your own Expendables villain!
As you've no doubt seen discussed on The Pirate Bay, The Expendables 3 hits cinemas this week. It's a franchise famous for overblown action, probable steroid abuse and dubious berets, but above all else, it's famous for its ridiculous character names. Joining Lee Christmas, Hale Caesar and Toll Road is Mel Gibson's villain: Conrad Stonebanks. Let the swill around your mouth for a few minutes.

Spoiler alert

Posted by Ali Gray at 16:30 on 13 Aug 2014
Spoiler alert
Short film, am I right or am I right?

That's easy for you to say McFerrin, you happy-clappy prick (*sobs*)

Posted by Ali Gray at 09:20 on 12 Aug 2014


Bye, Robin. You always made it easier to be happy.

50 fun facts you didn't know about The Expendables or maybe you did

Posted by Ali Gray at 09:00 on 11 Aug 2014
50 fun facts you didn't know about The Expendables or maybe you did
You'd think by now, with three Expendables movies under his Expendabelt, we'd know all there is to know about Sylvester Stallone, Barney Ross and his motley crew of mercenaries. You'd be wrong: DEAD WRONG. Because they are mysteries wrapped in enigmas wrapped in delicious sausagemeat. Here are 50 things you could never conceivably have known about The Expendables, you close-minded little shrimps.

The Sin City 2 character poster you've all been waiting for

Posted by Ali Gray at 14:30 on 10 Aug 2014
The Sin City 2 character poster you've all been waiting for
Powers Boothe is literally 20th on the cast list.

The 2014 movie poster mash-up you didn't know you didn't want to see

Posted by Ali Gray at 11:30 on 07 Aug 2014
The 2014 movie poster mash-up you didn't know you didn't want to see
I'm just sayin' what everyone be thinkin', yo. (Large here).
Out this week
+Million Dollar Arm (PG)
Our review
+As Above, So Below (15)
Our review
+Obvious Child (15)
Our review
+Mystery Road (15)
Our review
+Let's Be Cops (15)
+If I Stay (12A)
+Night Moves (15)