Latest
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The X Factor: season 15, 4th live show recap: “What happens in Ibiza…”
TV Feature | Matthew Horton | 12th November 2018
When did Nile Rodgers meet all these X Factor finalists in Ibiza? Were we supposed to have watched all the auditions and six-chair challenges and judges’ houses stages and stuff? These questions and more not even close to answered as we arrive at one of the highlights of the X Factor calendar: Movie Week! It’s right up there...
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The Apprentice: season 14, episode 6 recap: "Nightmare at 20,000 Feet"
TV Feature | Ed Williamson | 7th November 2018
I'm happily watching the snooker on ITV4. It's an engrossing second-round match in the Champion of Champions tournament in which Kyren Wilson is opening up a confident lead over Judd Trump, and I'm nicely settled in after dinner and oh, what's this notification on my phone? Why, it's a Google Calendar reminder to OH SHIT I'VE GOT TO WATCH THE FUCKING APPRENTICE
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The X Factor: season 15, 3rd live show recap: "DALEKGATE"
TV Feature | Matthew Horton | 5th November 2018
The third live show of this year's X Factor was a total fiasco. They also had problems with the sound. Thank goodness Nile Rodgers was there to save the day, the Chic disco don standing in for Robbie Williams when he swans off on tour to South America or whatever excuse he's using to strand his wife in the UK without him for a fortnight. Still, Nile Rodgers. The elusive Nile Rodgers. Did you know you only get to see Nile if you say his name into a mirror three times? And every time you turn on the telly.
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The Apprentice: season 14, episode 5 recap: "A Load of Old Cobblers"
TV Feature | Becky Suter | 2nd November 2018
Sneakerfactory.net (the one-stop shop for all your shoe consultation needs) provides the basic steps into how to become a shoe designer; learn how to draw, go to a design school, get a shoe mentor, build a portfolio and read plenty of books. Or, just do it because a grumpy old millionaire has told you to do it in 24 hours, and oh, can you make the canapés for the launch event as well? What even is this any more?
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The X Factor: season 15, 2nd live show recap: "Guilty! Pleasure?"
TV Feature | Matthew Horton | 29th October 2018
We've just remembered The X Factor's still going, so let's get back on board with Britain's second favourite talent show featuring Simon Cowell. There's a lot to catch up on. Robbie Williams has found himself a wife, Louis Walsh has been replaced by a whole new Louis and it's all on telly at about midnight so it doesn't get embarrassed by Strictly. It's time! To face! The music! Or an approximation thereof.
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The Apprentice: season 14, episode 4 recap: "Crotch Socks"
TV Feature | Ed Williamson | 25th October 2018
I don't go to the gym. In a sense the street is my gym, but in another, more real sense, it's a street, down which I walk, not going into gyms, and eating Greggs ham and cheese pasties.
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The Apprentice: season 14, episode 3 recap: "Your Donuts Make Me Go Nuts"
TV Feature | Becky Suter | 20th October 2018
This week, a tricky technical leaves one contestant in tears when our amateur bakers are asked to create 2000 show-stopping doughnuts, despite the fact that their backgrounds range from digital marketing to tree surgery and absolutely nothing to do with running a pop-up bakery. As the heat rises, who will be Star Baker, who will leave the tent, and who’s got a soggy bottom? It’s The Great British Bake O-h hang on.
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The Apprentice: season 14, episode 2 recap: "Bad Boys, Ink"
TV Feature | Ed Williamson | 14th October 2018
I noticed the other day that A Question of Sport is still on TV. Literally still being broadcast on televisions. So as much as I would've been delighted if The Apprentice had been cancelled this year, I suppose it's understandable it's further down the list.
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The Apprentice: season 14, episode 1 recap: "Can You Do It Squid Pro Quo?"
TV Feature | Becky Suter | 4th October 2018
Theresa May was right - the British people need to know an end is in sight. 14 years of this and not even Alan's Twitter can bring down the behemoth that is The Apprentice. I'd take Lord Sugar's Racist World Cup over the next 12 weeks of more corporate cum dumpsters trying to flog pork sandwiches to a vegan cafe before being sent home in a black cab (Note: this is a lie).
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The solid gold twats of The Apprentice 2018, in their own words
TV Feature | Becky Suter | 26th September 2018
It's not business, it's war - or, more specifically, it's a bunch of bum-licking bellends in suits making bad analogies. Lord Alan Sugar is back to bark at more briefcase wankers, and I'm back to pass judgement because I've got nothing else better to do. Let's meet the contestants of the 2018 series of The Apprentice and hear from them in their own words!
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